I have been lucky in the extreme to have had so many folks share some rather philosophical pieces of work with me. This has come about over some time since I have had a computer with email. Some of the stuff I got was just so-so in my opinion, and it got deleted right away. But hidden there from time to time was some writing that left a person thinking for some time after. My folks are all gone and have been for over 30 years, and I have to admit that of the few regrets I have, being a kind of absentee son to my mother was one of them. So, I simply ask you to read the piece, and if you still have the chance, fix up that absentee relationship with your family. Sometimes there are no second chances.

Being a Mother…

After 21 years of marriage, I discovered a new way of keeping alive the spark of love.

A little while ago I started to go out with another woman. It was really my wife’s idea. "I know that you love her," she said one day, taking me by surprise.

"But I love YOU," I protested. "I know, but you also love her."

The other woman that my wife wanted me to visit was my mother, who has been a widow for 19 years the demands of my work and my three children had made it possible to visit her only occasionally. That night called to invite her to go out for dinner and a movie.

"What’s wrong, are you okay?" she asked. My mother is the type of woman who suspects that a late night call or a surprise invitation is a sign of bad news. "I thought that it would be nice to spend some time with you," I responded.

"Just the two of us?" She thought about it for a moment, and then said, "I would like that very much." That Friday after work, as I drove over to pick her up I was a bit nervous.

When I arrived at her house, I noticed that she, too, seemed to be nervous about our "date." She waited in the door with her coat on.

She had curled her hair and was wearing the dress that she had worn to celebrate her last wedding anniversary. She smiled from a face that was as radiant as an angel’s. "I told my friends that I was going to go out with my son, and they were impressed," she said, as she got into the car. "They can’t wait to hear about our meeting."

We went to a restaurant that, although not elegant, was very nice and cozy.

My mother took my arm as if she were the First Lady. After we sat down, I had to read the menu. Her eyes could only read large print.

Halfway through the entrees, I lifted my eyes and saw Mom sitting there staring at me. A nostalgic smile was on her lips. "It was I who used to have to read the menu when you were small," she "Then it’s time that you relax and let me return the favour," I responded.

During the dinner we had an agreeable conversation – nothing extraordinary – but catching up on recent events of each other’s life. We talked so much that we missed the movie. As we arrived at her house later, she said, "I’ll go out with you again, but only if you let me invite you." I agreed.

"How was your dinner date?" asked my wife when I got home. "Very nice. Much more so than I could have imagined," I answered. A few days later my mother died of a massive heart attack. It happened so suddenly that I didn’t have a chance to do anything for her.

Some time later I received an envelope with a copy of a restaurant receipt from the same place my mother and I had dined. An attached note read: "Son, I paid this bill in advance. I was almost sure that I couldn’t be there but, nevertheless, I paid for two plates – one for you and the other for your wife. You will never know what that night meant for me. I love you."

At that moment I understood the importance of saying, in time: "I LOVE YOU" and to give our loved ones the time that they deserve. Nothing in life is more important than your family. Give them the time they deserve, because these things cannot be put off till "some other time."

Now, wasn’t that nice!

Have a Great Day!

Ross Smile


About techmech

Older type, enjoys computer, cruising, photography, fishing, travel, good food and movies

2 responses »

  1. Pat Achen says:

    Hi Ross, enjoyed the letter about dinner with a Mother. My Dad’s favourite birthday gift was when I told him for his birthday I was going to spend the whole day with him doing exactly what he wanted. He planned the whole day ending up with the Legion and telling everyone I was his date.

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